Author Topic: Were You Considered Cool Or Were You Bullied Growing Up (your stories)  (Read 4304 times)

I was bullied extremely bad in 4th grade but after that, it stopped.

but I never could play with the other students through the entire recess in all of my elementary school years
1st-6th  because I would get kicked out of the game when someone else wanted to play, I always was picked last in the gym class. so I just gave up and played by myself at recess, early on.

In elementary school from 1st to 3rd grade I was only considered average. I was not cool or popular, when 4th grade came along I was considered retarded and gay and stupid by literary everyone except for 2 girls in my class. by the time 5th grade came I was so messed up from what happen to me in 4th grade I needed special help in order to advance to 6th grade. but I did so and was somehow, never bullied by other children my age again after 4th grade.

Advancing into middle school I walked tall and am amazed looking back. That all through middle school I never came across a single bully. And I remember later on in 8th grade that guy that was one of the leaders of my bullying in 4th grade apologized to me and I forgave him, years ago. I'm just looking back at my life, I guess you could say a lot of my peers thought I was cool in high school, but when I turned 16 till about 28 I was harassed by college student cyber bullies but that is mentioned in another topic I started on here.

Anyway this is some of my past. I never had any friends in elementary school, just neighborhood punks that liked to come over to my house and rob me.

The main reason why I brought this up is because, I wanted to see what culture differences there were for being consider cool, or the complete opposite. and just to ask a stupid question.

Does anyone remember when the kids of the 1990's used to consider anything and everything they disliked the word Gay? regardless of what anyone even knew what that meant? kids used would say stupid things like

this movie is gay

this video game is gay

this song is gay

this book is gay

« Last Edit: January 27, 2020, 04:10:57 am by oldgamerz »
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Re: Were You Considered Cool Or Were You Bullied Growing Up (your stories)
« Reply #1 on: January 27, 2020, 08:50:21 am »
I've never been bullied, but I've never been that popular or considered cool either. I had a few friends throughout school, but to everyone else I was fairly invisible. I've always been pretty introverted so socializing is something that just drains me in general. So I never cared that I didn't have a million friends and admirers growing up. I'm not exactly sure why, but the first year I started college I had a lot of friends, and remember it being exhausting trying to hang out with all of them, having someone who always wanted to hang out or talk, and just in general it felt like a lot of work. I'm one of those people that enjoys having a couple of people I'm very close to and that's pretty much the extent of my social needs.

thewelshman

Re: Were You Considered Cool Or Were You Bullied Growing Up (your stories)
« Reply #2 on: January 27, 2020, 11:38:08 am »
I grew up in a town of about 3500 people and any of the schools Elementary/Middle/High housed around 400 or so kids each. Apart from the one guy a grade that would bully everyone, we all knew each other and generally kept it to a minimum. I think the bullying normally stopped whenever the rest of us got bigger and had enough of it. The bullies were generally the guys in the class who had failed a year or two.

As far as being cool. I was an athlete who excelled in Football and baseball, so I was considered cool generally to the grades under me. I never thought of myself as cool or generally kept to my own group of friends. I'd say the years of 5th-8th were the worst for me. I think I'm better off for it as it helped shape me into who I am and also helped make me stand up for myself and my friends. I do thank my lucky stars that social media wasn't a think when I was a kid, though. That crap is poison for the most part.

Re: Were You Considered Cool Or Were You Bullied Growing Up (your stories)
« Reply #3 on: January 27, 2020, 12:21:14 pm »
I was on a military base until I was 12. There were a couple bullies, but nothing major becuase people moved around a lot- pretty much every new school year meant making new friends becuase most/all of them moved away during the year prior. New kids always got mobbed for a couple weeks while everyone figured out if they'd make a good friend.

Moving was jarring- it hadn't occurred to me until I started my new school that these kids had grown up with each other. They didn't need to talk to me. I think I made one friend during the half of 6th grade I had at that school- who quit talking to me by the beginning of 7th grade. Good LORD, was the first day of 7th grade hard- I won't get into everything, but no one in my class even went to the elementary school I'd done the half-year of 6th grade in. So I was starting from new kid square one, only nobody knew it. I made NO friends for months. I sat alone at lunch. I walked to the corner market my mom worked at, bought a magazine about horses with a pen pal section, and started writing a LOT of letters. Oddly enough, this is also when I got into gaming- a magazine my mom had won a subscription for & didn't update before we moved found us & finished the subscription. Mail was kinda my lifeline then, so the magazine worked its way into that. We couldn't afford new games, but I sure read about them every month!

Eventually things worked out- a girl I'd never seen before suddenly sat across from me at lunch. She had a horse backpack. I told her I liked it. We proceeded to eat lunch together everyday, without speaking, for weeks- until one multi-class PE session saw us sorted next to each other right before we were told to pick partners for something-or-other. We ended up proper friends after that. She got me into Star Wars & introduced me to the internet. Come high school we got put in different classes- but now I had the guts to try & talk to some people, and a gaming magazine I hauled around which helped start conversations. There were attempts at bullying, but nothing ever stuck- I don't think they knew what to do with someone who'd developed a completely different value system than they did. Popularity? Sports? Who cares about that- games & anime are better, and the people are nicer. Hard to bully someone who treats you like the 'nerd'.

You've got me thinking about that magazine again- I actually attribute a lot of how my life is today to that subscription. Those issues helped me make friends, which provided me new interests, which eventually put me in the right place to meet my fiancé. I don't know what any of those editors are doing nowadays, but if some retro con ever does a Game Players reunion and brings the 90s group together again, I NEED to be there. I have a lot to thank them for!
« Last Edit: January 27, 2020, 12:25:07 pm by hoshichiri »

kashell

Re: Were You Considered Cool Or Were You Bullied Growing Up (your stories)
« Reply #4 on: January 27, 2020, 12:26:39 pm »
Gods no. I was the opposite of cool back in the day. Thankfully, I had some amazing friends that were equally uncool. Liking the trifecta of anime, video games, and manga brought us together and cemented our uncoolness.

I was never severely bullied, but since I was short growing up kids would say mean things or try to shove me around. Trust me when I say it's not as bad as it sounds; I would shove right back or say something right back.

I'm thankful that I didn't grow up with social media. The toxicity of all that is going to eff up some youngins, which really worries me.

telly

Re: Were You Considered Cool Or Were You Bullied Growing Up (your stories)
« Reply #5 on: January 27, 2020, 12:58:49 pm »
I grew up in a small town with less than 2000 people. I had a pretty tight knit group of 4-5 friends back then (because there were only about 20 of us in our entire middle school class), but being in a small group like that meant things would get really clique-y. I also remember how popular it was to call everything "gay" and I think this was around the time social media and cell phones became much more common. Like 2008-2010.

I did one year of high school in NH and moved to Michigan when I was 15. When I started high school in Michigan, I immediately found a home among the theatre and band kids. It was an amazing group of people that instantly made me feel welcomed, so I never had any issues with bullying because I had such a strong base of like-minded nerdy people. Suffice to say, I think I was considered pretty cool back then. I was pretty popular, super involved with many extra-curricular activities, president of my theatre group at the school, Winterfest king my senior year, I definitely had the largest social group back then, that's for sure.

Then when I started nursing school that social life fell off a cliff lol. I was super stressed like all the time, and didn't really have a huge group of friends, maybe 4-5 close ones. And I didn't party or drink at all in college so was never really able to expand my social connections. Not that I regret it skipping out on the party crowd haha.

Now that I'm finishing up grad school I feel happy with my social connections. I have a couple friends from both high school and college that I meet with at least once a year. I have a nice group of friends both in real life across the US and internationally thanks to sites like this and Bulbagarden. Getting back into things like choir have really helped with that too. :)
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Re: Were You Considered Cool Or Were You Bullied Growing Up (your stories)
« Reply #6 on: January 27, 2020, 02:51:49 pm »
My friends thought I was cool. I was invisible or avoided by everybody else haha.
I really didn’t pay much attention to the “bullies”. I stuck with my circle most of the time and could probably handle myself otherwise.
I got along with everyone for the most part. Beer made my teens more enjoyable as well

Warmsignal

Re: Were You Considered Cool Or Were You Bullied Growing Up (your stories)
« Reply #7 on: January 27, 2020, 03:42:24 pm »
Neither. I was one of those weird nobody kids who only hung around the same couple of friends all of the time, and never so much as spoke to the majority of my peers in school to the point that sometimes people would tease me in claiming they'd never heard me speak. I only ever had maybe 1 or 2 friends at a time, and I tended to wreck those friendships for reasons I still don't completely understand. I was a loner essentially, and also was and still am, an introvert. That is I enjoy time spent alone with only my own thoughts, to spending time with other people.

For obvious reasons I was totally picked last on any team, for sure. I would have the odd run-in with a kid who wanted to start crap with me, but it was very rare and I felt like I could hold my own back then, so I wasn't intimidated. For the most part, people just left me alone and I did my own thing.


Regarding the trend of calling everything gay, I totally remember when that was a thing and it's so cringe to think back to now. Using an orientation as a dig is so ignorant and foolish, and reflects so poorly on the person doing it. It's quite jarring now how rapidly this has changed, in that one of my favorite sitcoms from back then, The King of Queens would frequently use the term "gay" as a pejorative in some of the episodes, and it's extremely cringe inducing and feels so out of touch. Disappointing as the writing otherwise I thought was pretty good for a sitcom.
« Last Edit: January 27, 2020, 04:09:28 pm by Warmsignal »

telly

Re: Were You Considered Cool Or Were You Bullied Growing Up (your stories)
« Reply #8 on: January 27, 2020, 04:34:58 pm »
I thought that calling things gay as a pejorative really took off after that one scene from Community
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Warmsignal

Re: Were You Considered Cool Or Were You Bullied Growing Up (your stories)
« Reply #9 on: January 27, 2020, 04:58:53 pm »
I thought that calling things gay as a pejorative really took off after that one scene from Community

Not sure. But  I distinctly remember it as common slang on the school yard through out the 90s and early 2000s.

telly

Re: Were You Considered Cool Or Were You Bullied Growing Up (your stories)
« Reply #10 on: January 27, 2020, 05:02:08 pm »
I thought that calling things gay as a pejorative really took off after that one scene from Community

Not sure. But  I distinctly remember it as common slang on the school yard through out the 90s and early 2000s.

Maybe it was because of where I grew up but it really started getting bad in the late 2000s for me.
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sworddude

Re: Were You Considered Cool Or Were You Bullied Growing Up (your stories)
« Reply #11 on: January 27, 2020, 05:04:12 pm »


this movie is gay

this video game is gay

this song is gay

this book is gay

i can assure you that in 2017-2020 for teens saying everything is gay is still highly popular. that's definitely not something from the past only since in the past few years calling everything gay is pretty popular among teens and kids.
« Last Edit: January 27, 2020, 05:24:02 pm by sworddude »
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Re: Were You Considered Cool Or Were You Bullied Growing Up (your stories)
« Reply #12 on: January 27, 2020, 05:26:59 pm »


this movie is gay

this video game is gay

this song is gay

this book is gay

i can assure you that in 2017-2020 for teens saying everything is gay is still highly popular currently. that's definitely not something from the past only since in the past few years calling everything gay is pretty popular among teens and kids.

It must have started where I always lived in the state of Michigan or as I figure, history is repeating itself, I'm 31 and This  calling every thing Gay thing is ancient history, I was in 4th grade when this all started to get hot and I was at the brunt of this. some time in the mid to late 1990's
« Last Edit: January 27, 2020, 05:29:21 pm by oldgamerz »
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Re: Were You Considered Cool Or Were You Bullied Growing Up (your stories)
« Reply #13 on: January 27, 2020, 06:35:30 pm »
I played football in high school and baseball from the age of 10 to 18 so I guess I was "cool". The one or two times someone tried to bully me I beat them up.

Re: Were You Considered Cool Or Were You Bullied Growing Up (your stories)
« Reply #14 on: January 27, 2020, 06:39:30 pm »
I do thank my lucky stars that social media wasn't a think when I was a kid, though. That crap is poison for the most part.
Yeah I was in High School when social media was getting big and it defiantly messed up a decent amount of people.